so this is maybe a weird one to ask but does pain actually change who you are, or does it just make it harder to access the person you already were? i got diagnosed with fibromyalgia last month after five years of specialists shrugging. that part i can explain. what i can’t explain is that i used to be the person who organized the pharmacy break room potluck, kept a running group chat going, said yes to plans without thinking twice.
lately i cancel more than i keep and when i do show up i’m quieter, flatter, like i’m watching myself from a few feet back. i don’t know if that’s the fibro itself, central sensitization messing with more than just pain signals, or just exhaustion from managing symptoms all day wearing down the parts of me that used to have energy for other people. my pain clinic doctor asked if i’m depressed and honestly i don’t know how to separate “depressed” from “worn down by being in pain constantly,” those feel like different things to me but maybe they’re not. anyone else notice their personality shifted since the pain got chronic?
not asking if you’re sad about being sick, i mean literally different, quieter, less patient, less curious, whatever it is for you. and if it did shift, did any of it come back, or is this just the new baseline now?